Our Wedding Day July 17, 2004

On November 13. 2003, the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court (“SJC”) ruled that denying marriage and its protections to same-sex couples is unconstitutional under the equality and liberty provisions of the Massachusetts Constitution. The court stated in the majority opinion, “We construe civil marriage to mean the voluntary union of two persons as spouses, to the exclusion of all others. This reformulation redresses the plaintiffs’ constitutional injury and furthers the aim of marriage to promote stable, exclusive relationships.” This groundbreaking case led to a 180-day waiting period before the ruling would go into effect on May 17, 2004. This period was filled with endless debate, opinion pieces, and protests, culminating in a constitutional convention pitting the governor and the state house democratic leadership against the state senate leadership and many advocacy and religious groups.

In the end, the con-con did pass the first-round of a constitutional ban that could ban same-sex marriages in the state of Massachusetts. This amendment must be passed again in the 2005 legislative session, and then be put on the 2006 ballot. The Federal Marriage Amendment, with strong support from the Bush administration, was defeated on a procedural vote on July 13, 2004.

It is under these circumstances that we decided to "hurry" and legalize our marriage as soon as possible, while it is still possible. 

We chose July 17 as our wedding date as it has always been our "anniversary" date - the date in 1993 when we first met.

On Saturday, July 17, 2004, at 5:30pm in front of a very small group of friends and family, we were officially, legally wed by David Barrett, Justice of the Peace, in Somerville, Massachusetts.

We truly wanted to do "the big ceremony" and party, but there was simply not enough time to secure a venue, and our out-of-town family and friends would not have had enough time to plan their travels. We are currently planning for a renewal ceremony/reception for the same date in 2005 - so please save that weekend on your calendars! More details will follow.

We have put this page together in order to share this day with our friends and family who were not able to be here "live". We would like to thank Roni for his keen skills as both a cameraman and video editor (and to Violet and Jonathon for putting up with him!).

Click Here for Movie

If you have the inclination - and high-speed internet connection - this is the 20 minute video that Roni compiled. It's a VERY LARGE (xxMb) file, so be warned!

Our friends Harris and Ria were kind enough to host the wedding at Sabur, their awesome restaurant in Somerville. This meant so much to us, not only because the atmosphere, food, and people are so great ... but because Harris and Ria (and our little girls Scooby and Phoebe) have become such good friends. Their warmth and love really helped make this day extra-special.

Harris & Ria in front of the restaurant with Marc & Jeffrey. After the ceremony, a tremendous Mediterranean feast (and Marc and Jeffrey's favorite Grgich Plavac Mali from Croatia). The perfect ending was an awesome strawberry wedding cake with Turkish coffee.

Our "Wedding Party"

           
Marc and Jeffrey with David Barrett, Justice of the Peace; Jeffrey and his mom preparing for our guests; Marjorie putting the "finishing touches" on her boys

   
"Do you?" ... "Do you?"... "You Are!"  - David wrote a very simple, short, and moving ceremony.

Marriage is a meditation on our histories as well as on our future.
It is a consideration of where we have come from,
as well as on all of our hopes and possibilities.

One of the ultimate consequences of marriage is the transformation of ourselves.
That person which we become in the presence of the person we love most deeply,
choose to marry, and to create our lives with--
is someone better and different than the person we are alone.

In this transformation, we become who we were meant to be;
in this covenant of marriage we nurture the life we were meant to live;
in this new family we grow and develop the relationships that brought us to this day today.

The minute I heard my first love story
I started looking for you, not knowing
how blind that was.

Lovers don't finally meet somewhere.
They're in each other all along.
--Rumi

                  
"Little people" like Jonathon and our Goddaughter Sammy really helped us all keep things in perspective -- it's most about the joy and happiness!

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We truly dedicate our wedding day to our friends and families. Without their love, support, encouragement (and sometimes kick in the pants!) we would not have made it to this point in our lives. We are in awe that we have now become a part of history, among one of the first gay marriages in the U.S. We will continue to work with groups like the Human Rights Campaign, GLAD, NGLTF, and MassEquality to ensure that this right of equality is not taken away, and to help people in other parts of the country be able to do what we have done.

Christine and Marianne warned us that "it changes" after the wedding day. We are both pleasantly surprised at how accurate that statement was.